Marshall and the Movies

Was I really dying to know what happened to the characters of the “American Pie” series once Jason Biggs’ Jim Levenstein tied the knot with Alyson Hannigan’s Michelle Flaherty?  To be honest, no.  The ridiculous high school pals that love to talk about sex, sex, and … oh yeah, sex, are fun to spend an hour and a half with, yet they really aren’t worth a moment’s thought once the credits begin to roll.

But for all those who really need to know what has become of East Great Falls High’s graduating class of 1999, “American Reunion” exists.  Surprise – no one has changed all that much!  If you took five minutes to think about what the most likely life trajectories would be for all the characters, congratulations, you have the same IQ as the screenwriters.

Jim is still as horny as ever, and thankfully the film is able to justify some of his exploits by raising the stakes and amplifying the embarrassment (translation: some very uncomfortable Biggs full-frontal nudity).  Seann William Scott’s Stifler is still a jerk (and his mom is still busty as ever); Thomas Ian Nichols’ Kevin and Chris Klein’s Oz are still struggling with their feelings for the lovely Vicky (Tara Reid) and Heather (Mena Suvari), respectively; Eddie Kaye Thomas’ Finch is still an enigma to the rest of the group and to us.

If “American Reunion” really wanted to shock us, the better option would have been to have some of these characters fundamentally change.  Compared to seeing Jason Biggs’ penis smushed under the lid of a pot, a script that dared to challenge the notion that people aren’t doomed to keep reliving new version of their high school problems would have registered much higher on the Richter scale of shock.

Instead, we get to see the old archetypes thrown into a rerun of the good old days, forcing the characters we once loved to act out the plot of Adam Sandler’s “Grown Ups.”  How much that can entertain you depends on how much you liked these characters in the first place.  C /